Ogden Nash Quotes

The Perfect Husband

He tells you when you’ve got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hipstick.

Crossing The Border

Senescence begins and middle age ends the day your descendents outnumber your friends.

The Bath

I test my bath before I sit, and I’m always moved to wonderment. That what chills the finger not a bit is so frigid upon the fundament.

My Dream

Here is a dream. It is my dream, my own dream, I dreamt it. I dreamt that my hair was kempt then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.

I do, I Will, I Have

Just as I am unsure of the difference between flora and fauna and flotsam and jetsam, I am quite sure that marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgetsam.

And he refuses to believe there is a leak in the water pipe or the gas pipe and she is convinced she is about to asphyxiate or drown.

As she says, Quick, get up and get my hairbrushes off the window sill, it’s raining in, and he replies, Oh, they’re all right, it’s only raining straight down.

That is why marriage is so much more interesting than divorce. Because it’s the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force.

So I hope husbands and wives will continue to debate and combat over everything debatable and combatable. Because I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has income and she is pattable.

Loving Cup

To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.

 ogden nash

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About jeneanecommonplacebook

What Is a Commonplace Book? A commonplace book is someone’s personal collection of quotes, witticisms, observances, poems, and even graffiti that have inspired them, made them laugh or touched them in some way. Many famous people throughout history have had commonplace books, such as Thomas Jefferson, John Milton, Mark Twain, Henry David Thoreau, and the scientist, Carl Linnaeus. I began my commonplace books while I was in junior high school in the early 1970’s and so I have almost 50 years of quotes about such a wide variety of topics told in ways more eloquent, wise or humorous than anything I could ever come up with. And it’s wonderful that in this type of blog, I can also include some of my favorite artists and their artwork as well. I'm almost 60 years old with a daughter, 3 granddaughters, and a kitty-cat. I live in beautiful Bay City, MI. I have 2 associate degrees with additional college credits and hopefully I will be able to complete my goal of obtaining my Bachelor's Degree in Accounting. (Life keeps getting in the way). I enjoy literature, horse racing, baseball, NFL football, The Olympics, astronomy, history (particularly Irish), art, old movies, Downton Abbey, The Good Wife, Unit One, science, The Beatles, Frank Sinatra, U2, The Doors, oh and so much more! I have very eclectic and prolific interests. If you would like to check out my personal writings, please go to jeneanebehmeswritings.wordpress.com
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